Living On
by Mina41q
Summary: Today is the day. The day Johnny and Dallas will truly be gone; their funeral. Pony imagines life ahead without them, about what he could've done to change this, but it's no use. Today is the day he says goodbye. Three-Shot!
1. Chapter 1

**So, Hi! This is my first story. I wrote it for an English paper and got an A, so I thought I might as well post it on here, seeing how I read so much from this website. Please give reviews, I would love to improve! Also, if you guys could give me a new name that would be great. Living On is terrible.**

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"Pony, wake up," Soda nudged me, but I always was a heavy sleeper.

"Huh, what time is it?"

"Eight, we gotta go soon."

"Right." Today is Johnny and Dally's funeral. We're doing a joint funeral because who wants to go to two funerals?

"Listen, I gotta take a shower, so could you get of my arm?" Sodapop said, and I realized that the warm lump under me wasn't a pillow after all and gave Soda his arm back. He thanked me before he grabbed his towel. Now I have the room to myself.

Getting up from our bed I tripped over some of Soda's textbooks. He's been studying for his G.E.D. for the last two weeks. I am happy for him, but he needs to stop leaving his books on the floor or I'm gonna break my neck.

I started to put on my suit. The suit was black and it used to be Soda's. The last time it had been worn was at our folks' funeral. It was all going well, until the tie. I couldn't do it, there were so many twists and knots.

"Darry, can you help me with my tie!"

"Sure."

Darry came over, he was already dressed with his hair brushed. "You should learn how to tie a tie," he said as he took it off of me.

"Never had the chance," I said as he wrapped it around himself. Once he was finished he put it back on me.

"You okay Ponyboy?", Darry looked at me with worried eyes, "You look kind of down." "Yeah, I'm fine," I answered. I didn't want Darry to be concerned with me, he's got enough on his plate. The truth is I was sad, who wouldn't be? Today is my friend's' funeral.

"If you ever need to talk I'm here. You know that, right?"

These past few weeks Darry and me have gotten real close. It's like we're brothers again. When I didn't answer him, he left, leaving me alone again.

I looked in the mirror, The suit didn't look _tuff._ I looked like a Soc. While I was greasing my hair, I realized something. "My roots are showing," I said out loud softly from shock. Had it really been three weeks? Three weeks since Johnny dyed my hair. It feels like a lifetime ago. I remember that day, when me and Johnny had to cut our hair to hide from the cops. I put up such a fit when he kept pullin' my mine. He never complained about it. I felt that cutting our hair stripped our identities, but he was too scared to think otherwise. Man, I miss that kid.

"Soda, Pony it's time to go!"

Darry hollered us over to go. Seeing my hair undone I scolded myself for takin' so long and quickly finished, doing a half-*ssed job. Rushing into the living room, I saw Soda fully dressed. _How long was I zoned out?_ I asked myself.

"Oh, Pony you're ready. Let's go," Two-Bit was reclining on the couch. _How long has he been here?_

"It's eight-twenty, what took you so long?" Soda asked, looking concerned.

"I was spacin' out," I deadpanned. I didn't want to lie to them, they know when I lie.

"Everybody! Get in the car!" Darry roared. Darry was gonna drive us, since being the oldest means it's his job to make sure we all get there safely. At least, that's what he tells me.

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 **Also, I have a live poll at my page. It's for what I should write next. Please vote!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey, I don't have anything to say. Enjoy!**

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Arriving at the funeral, I was surprised to see so many people there. Darry arranged most all of it, and put it in the newspaper. Some of the kids we saved and their parents were here, and so were the cop and the teacher I met in the ambulance. Also lots of friends of Dally's I recognized from the party, that night we asked him for help. Cherry was here too, but I expected her to be. She was a part of this whole mess. Helping us by betraying her friends couldn't have been easy.

I looked around, this place was in a park. It didn't look like any funeral I've ever seen before. Then again I've only been to one: my parents. There were two big photos of Johnny and Dally, but I didn't see any caskets.

"Where are the caskets?" I asked Two-Bit, softly to not disturb anyone.

"Those are for funerals, this is a memorial. You do know that, right?" he answered, looking at me with his eyebrows all scrunched.

"I thought we were going to a funeral."

"No, those are too expensive, and we don't have any cash." I realized he was right, funerals have to be only days after the person died. Bodies don't keep long. Also funerals are usually done by families, even ones as sh*tty as Johnny's."Since Johnny was charged with manslaughter and the cops killed Dal, they took 'em to the county morgue. Johnny's ma pick him up, didn't invite any of us 'course, but no one can claim Dally 'cuz he doesn't have any kin, legally." I could see his eyes start to redden.

"Ponyboy, got a smoke?", Two-Bit asked me.

"Sure." I pulled them out. I felt like one too.

When I handed it to him he looked around skittishly, like he was looking for something. He thanked me and beckoned me to follow him. Walking around everybody was a strange sight. They all looked so out-of-place. The kids were impatient, but trying to be respectful. Soda was talking with the teacher while Darry was lookin' at the photos he put together in the front.

I followed Two-Bit to a to a park bench, out of earshot. It was in a small courtyard off to the side with some scrawny little shrubs someone had planted thinkin' they'd spruce the place up. There was some choice phallic graffiti on the bench. The old Two-Bit could've made ten jokes right of the bat seeing a monstrosity like that, but he has been different lately, more quiet. While we were finishing our cigarettes he never once looked at me. I wondered what was wrong.

"Pony, I gotta leave Eastside."

My head shot up to him, his face turned away from me.

"What?" I asked in a high voice. I knew what he said, I just didn't believe it.

"Let me explain," I calmed down, I didn't want to get angry at a stupid joke. This had to be a joke, right?

"After all that's happened, I just can't be around you guys anymore. I gotta get out of here, change so I can be a stronger person and be able to protect my friends, and I can't do that here. The world is a harsh place, Ponyboy. This is one of the things it does to you. Goodbye."

I was shocked. Was this the same Two-Bit who cracks stupid jokes at anything? The same Two-Bit that is my friend. Why would he need to become stronger? The same Two-Bit who couldn't wait to fight some Socs? The same Two-Bit whose greatest pride is his knife? The same Two-Bit that is my friend?

As he was walking I couldn't be frozen any more.

"So you're just gonna leave, huh _?"_ My words dripping in acid, he froze. " _So you're just gonna leave?!"_ He looked down at the ground, but didn't turn around. "After everything we've been through, you're just gonna leave us behind?! What ever happened to 'we Greasers gotta stick together', huh Two-Bit?!" He clenched his fists, turned around and grabbed me by the shoulders.

"Do you think I like this? I can't be around my friends anymore without hating myself!"

We stood in silence, angry tears running down our faces. He pried himself off of me and we sat down on the grass. Nether of us spoke for what seemed like hours.

"I just need to put this all behind me. I don't- I can't when being around y'all is like a constant reminder," he said, breaking the silence that filled the air. Then he left the park and my life. I didn't see him at the memorial after that, or ever again. I miss him, but he was right, in the end we all felt guilty, especially me.


	3. Chapter 3

**So this is the last part of the three-shot. I hoped you enjoyed it!**

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I walked back to park, dazed. I could hear bits of Sodapop's speech, somehow able to make everybody laugh. But that's just the way he is, able to make any frown a smile. I sat down next to Darry and he looked at me and gave me a soft smile. Telling him about Two-Bit would break his heart, so I smiled back.

"-those rascals." Soda finished and the crowd chuckled. He came over and patted me on the back. "You're up, Pony."

I paced up to the front, my hands sweating. Looking at everybody, I took a shaky breath. "I'm surprised at the turnout- I didn't realize that so many cared about a couple o' hoods. Although, Johnny never was like the rest of us. He wasn't bad, he just wanted a place to fit in. Johnny, he never carried a switchblade until he had to. Kind and scared is what I'd call him. And Dally, he had some great things 'bout him too. Sure, he was the hardest kind they come in, but he also cared for his friends, cared about our dreams. These are the kind of friends you search your whole life for. The ones that will stay, the ones who will fight for you. I had these friends, and for as short as our time was I'm satisfied. I got to meet them, be with them. When me and Johnny were up at the church in Windrixville, we spent a lot of time lookin' at sunsets. I said to him:

 _Nature's first green is gold,_

 _Her hardest hue to hold._

 _Her early leafs a flower;_

 _But only so an hour._

 _Then leaf subsides to leaf._

 _So Eden sank to grief,_

 _So dawn goes down to day._

 _Nothing gold can stay._

This is a poem by Robert Frost. His message was that nothing perfect can stay forever. But good things will always come again. Johnny's last words to me- to anyone- were 'stay gold'. This message I take to heart, for as perfect as Johnny and Dally may be, there are other things worth waiting for."

When I finished all my jitters and nervousness had melted away. The crowd had been silenced, with hopeful looks on their faces. I rushed back to my seat next to Darry, I was embarrassed with myself, it took so much courage to get up there. I thought I was just gonna crack a anecdote from happier days, but I ended up with a speech. "Pony, that was great!" Soda said, welcoming me back to my seat.

"Yeah, guess it was."

Maybe there were better things to come. The past is behind us, and I can do anything with my life. Being with those two was great, but many more things are to come. And I can't wait to do them.

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 **Goodbye!**


End file.
